Is it okay to make mistakes?

[Dragondrool]

I've only had a few reptiles, and I just feel so responsible if I make a mistake or if one of them dies. Is it okay to sometimes just have bad luck or a badly bred reptile? I decided Ecoearth isn't good for cresties, despite what I've been told. I really thought it was okay, and I think it was part of the reason mine passed, but it still makes no sense as he would've shown signs of impaction. But either way I won't be using that again. I believe I just got really unlucky and got a badly bred gecko that wasn't obvious to the store or myself, as they're very sweet and responsible.

Sometimes I forget that mistakes happen and not everything is my fault, because my leopard gecko and tarantula are fine and thriving. I still feel bad and very anxious to consider getting another reptile. I've been having a growing anxiety towards reptiles as well, not for the animal itself but fear I'll hurt it or kill it. I hate touching them because I'm so scared to cause damage.

Any tips to help make one feel themselves better about mistakes? Thanks, much love.

 

[buppiboyo12]

Personally, I can relate to this. I've had animals die, thinking it was my fault.

One time I had gotten an anole (later another) because I wanted to save it since I noticed it had 3 legs (I got it from petsmart). Basically, they ended up developing these lumps on their heads, and eventually one died, then a year or so later the other. It made me really sad and upset as I thought it was my fault, and I didn't do my very best to care for them, but later I realized that it wasn't just me.

I decided that I didn't want reptiles anymore, so I took a year without having any pets. I got a betta fish about 6-7 months ago, and I bought him a heater and a large tanker after doing tons of research. It inspired me to want a reptile again.

Over the summer (total of 5 months) I was constantly doing research on leopard geckos. So. Much. Research. I knew it all. I could tell someone how to take care of a leopard gecko like I knew the back of my hand. When I felt I knew everything, I pulled the plug and bought one. He is healthy and happy (although there was a slight issue recently, he's fine now), but based on the history I've had with pets it always worries me when something is off or he is not acting right.

What I've learned is this: whatever pet you have, it's not going to be perfect. If it is, then something is wrong. It's part of the experience and the learning curve.

My advice to you is: do your research. Do your research until you can tell someone how to take care of an animal without having to google it. Make sure you think long and hard about if the animal is right for you, etc. Also, never buy any live animals (other than feeder insects) from Petco or petsmart, as their animals come from animal mills (it's a horrible thing, you can find videos on it if you wish). I got my Leo from a breeder. You can also trust local breeders and reptile expos, as you can talk to the breeders and get very close to their animals.

Sometimes there are just unhealthy animals, sometimes things die and we don't know the reason. It's just life sometimes. But mistakes have to happen in order to succeed.

Hope I could help

 

[Dragondrool]

Thank you, that's a huge load off of my shoulders reading that. And yeah I saw some videos of how Petco gets their animals... I felt sick. I never want to buy from them if I can help it. I don't blame the reptile store I got my gecko from, I think it was just bad luck and too soon for me. I was feeling in the back of my head that I might be rushing into it, or whether I'm emotionally ready for another crested gecko. I feel a sort of resolve from this experience. It's unfortunate he passed, and even if it was my fault, there was nothing I could have done. Even if we managed to get him to the vet, he was already too weak and thin to live. Just bad luck.

And I'm happy to hear your leo is doing good! I have one, but he was bought from Petco from my sister's boyfriend as a gift to her (pets aren't good gifts unless the owner is responsible and willing to get a pet in my opinion) and was neglected. But he really pulled through these past few years and he's a fat and happy gecko who's got a bit of an attitude.

 

[buppiboyo12]

Glad he's doing well!

 

[NicKtheGreeK1997]

I've also done mistakes and lost animals because of poor knowledge and treatment negligence and that will haunt me till the day I die, so you better believe you are not alone in this. Just make sure that you do tons of research for each species you keep and every animal that is being taken under your care will have the best possible treatment and fulfil all their care needs.

That being said, I am certain that the death of your gecko didn't come from eco earth. Something else happened.

 

[BentonTal]

I've also done mistakes and lost animals because of poor Testogen knowledge and treatment negligence and that will haunt me till the day I die, so you better believe you are not alone in this.

Honestly, I'm glad you're raising this issue, Dragondrool. I think most of us are worried about that, or at least were at some point or another. You're bound to make mistakes in the beginning I think.

 

[Rio_]

My first reptile was a corn snake, I had researched lots beforehand and wanted one since pretty much forever, and when I finally got him I was terrified I would wake up, check on him, and he'd just be dead. You feel such a weight of responsibility! I've recently gotten geckos, I was told the two adults were perfectly fine cohabiting, but it wasn't long before I noticed wounds on one. I've never owned geckos before, and the person that gave them to me SHOULD have known whether they were okay together or not... but I followed my instincts and decided to separate them, but whilst I was waiting for the second tank to come through the mail, the gecko that was being bullied developed mouth rot. I've had no experience of it before, but I saw a little bit of brown gunk on her bottom lip, and I wasn't willing to take the chance, so I took her to the vet that same day. Thankfully we had caught it early so she didn't need antibiotics, I moved her into the new tank as soon as I had chance, and she recovered superbly and they are both SO much happier now!

So my advice would be to follow your instincts, and just do the best you can do, that's all anyone can ask of you.

 

[markappleyard]

I also had some kind of bad experience to take care of a tortoise then it died. Since then I do not want to take for a granted anymore, I need to make some research, write down a careful facts sheet and any sheet that help me along and understand the personalities and the behaviour of each animal. No rush. Better late than never. Until I fully understand how it works then I will decide about the pet adoption thing.